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September 22nd, 2008

Something Embarrassing This Way Comes

And with every step I've taken today I'm reminded of it!

Yesterday evening I was bundling up the last of the tree debris in the back yard for transport out to the front yard for trash pickup today. I'd bundle up a bunch of branches and tie them together with *gasp!* speaker cable. I know this sounds like an expensive proposition but it wasn't really that bad. I only used the "used" cable. This stuff has been languishing in a drawer in my garage for as long as we have had the house. So something over 10 years. And I have a lot of surplus. I've already got the house wired as well as we need. And then there are two other reasons as well:
  1. I have a couple of these Airport Express ™ thingies (It's a technical term!) with what Apple calls "AirTunes" ™ These enable you to use iTunes over your wireless network to your stereo system(s). In my case I have one on the main stereo in the Family Room and one in the bedroom. And they work pretty good. Couple that with the Remote App for the iPod Touch and iPhone a free download from the iTunes store and a universal remote and you can have music wherever you go.
  2. The cable was here. And I was here. And I couldn't for the life of me, find any friggin' rope. And I wanted to finish this job. In the NOW sense of the word.


But I digress!

Anyways...

At any rate I would make up three or four bundles of reasonable lengths of branches, and then carry them to the street. And toss them on the pile that is already in the front yard by the curb and growing. 15 plus bags of leaves and stuff already out there.

So...Cut, wrap, tie. Cut, wrap, tie. Cut, wrap, tie. Cut, wrap, tie. Carry the bundles to the street two at a time. Except for the one that had oak limbs in them. Oak is so much denser than any other wood in my yard.

So I pick up the last two bundles and trudge in the direction of the gate. Now bear in mind I am tired, sweaty, and a just little bit pissed that no one came out to help me with this little operation. I am about half the way to the gate from my processing plant. And apparently I am not really paying attention to where I am stepping and I hit a low spot. Or maybe a high spot. I dunno.

But my ankle gives a good twist...And...

I. Go. Down...! Bundles flying in opposite directions! I find myself laying on my back looking up at the sky through the branches in one of my oak trees. One good thing about Ike is he seems to have washed away any land mines (read: Piles of Dog Shit) that Nikko, who is our 80 lb boxer, may have deposited in the area of my drop.

So, the immediate threat of laying in shit being alleviated, I notice it feels kind of good laying there. Looking at the coloring sky, splayed out flat on my back. Arms and legs akimbo. And then my ankle starts to throb. That doesn't feel so good. So I roll over on my side to get up and come face to face with...

One of the sixteen varieties of cactus that (Ike knocked over) we seem to have strategically placed throughout the back yard. And this is not a friendly variety. The spines on this one are like hair. Very sticky. Very pointy! I carefully back away from the cactus, roll over the other way and drag myself to my feet. If I had thrown my arm out just a little differently, there would have been some serious ouchie! Ouch!

I finish up and go into the house. Take some advil and take a shower. And thence to bed.

Woke up this morning and put my feet on the floor and I can feel my mistake.

And with every step I've taken today.

So boys and girls...Be aware of where you are. Because you can never tell when you might end up...Flat on your back.

Oh, and the pile of trash at the curb? It is as tall as I am now.

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