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A Nice Day...

Very pleasant meal this afternoon with The Offspring and her Mom, cadona. Had Ham. And the girl child is doing the gluten-free thing, so we had a gluten free stuffing, roasted root veggies, cranberry sauce (homemade!) And I brought pistachio almond ice cream with chocolate sauce and almonds. Took vanilla too but we all wanted the green stuff! *laughs* It came home with me with a big ol’ plate of leftovers. Left the green ice cream and chocolate (dang!) and almonds at cadona’s place.

All in all a very pleasant way to spend an afternoon.

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I might head on out for a bit tonight, but I haven’t really decided yet.

Grateful? Fuck yes!

Grateful for relatively good health this year for most of the folks I know (and me). Thankful I have gotten a pretty good grip on sanity before I turned into some sort of nocturnal nutcase. I like sleeping at night. And waking up early in the morning**. I believe I have discussed this in these pages before.

It seems consistency can be a wonderful thing. Who knew?

At any rate, I am… Calm, cool and collected. Been quite sometime since I’ve even thought about it. But yeah. Had a really good year so far. Might not look like I’ve done a whole lot, but yer not lookin’ at it from my side. It’s been a year of growth for me. Probably

Whereas I had been stagnant for a few… Years. And soooooo angry. Where did all that go? I don’t know. But anger was counter-productive in the end. I used to say through gritted teeth that “anger was the only thing keeping me vertical!” Was it? Maybe at the time.

I’m pretty happy. Yes. There. I said it. Happy. I’m comfortable. In my own skin. Been a long time since I could even THINK that and not be lying to myself. Now I can say it. Out loud even. *laughs*

I laugh. A lot. At myself too.

And I’m optimistic about the what the future holds.

More adventures? Bring it.

Ahhhhm jus’ gettin’ sta-a-a-h-t-ed! <-- My Al Pacino imitation.

Been a year or thereabouts since I quit smoking. Quite the big deal that is. And grateful I am.

And I still have a lot of work to do. I still weigh too much and I'm not in very good shape. "Pear shaped" comes to mind *laughs*

But I'm still above ground, dammit! Thankful for that too.

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** I used to love being up before everyone in the house. In ALL my previous houses. Get a different vibe from a place where your loved ones are upstairs sleeping. Used to love that first cup of coffee in the quiet.

Living alone, I wasn’t feeling that vibe at all. All of a sudden it’s come back in full force. I love sitting on my patio early, early in the morning. Steaming coffee in my mug. I love being up that early… Ha! Maybe I’m gettin’ old...

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Be good to one another people!
KCCO

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Comments

( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
elvenforever
Nov. 23rd, 2012 09:58 am (UTC)
I'm glad your life is so good. Really nice to look back and see all the growing you were doing when you weren't looking. ;)
texasts
Nov. 23rd, 2012 01:43 pm (UTC)
Well it seems to be...

Much beter place than I was a couple of years ago.
elvenforever
Nov. 23rd, 2012 01:45 pm (UTC)
You've really worked hard on yourself this year and deserve the credit. And glad to hear things are better now than they were a couple of years ago. :)
texasts
Nov. 23rd, 2012 06:59 pm (UTC)
Jeebus. I guess you weren't here a couple years ago. Yeah I was a mess. Miserable. Crazed. Trapped.

Almost anything would have been an improvement. Still got work to do.
elvenforever
Nov. 24th, 2012 11:38 am (UTC)
I wasn't. I think we've known each other about a year now. So great to hear things have improved THAT much. :)
kabuldur
Nov. 23rd, 2012 11:06 am (UTC)
Oh that pistachio ice cream with chocolate sauce and almonds sounds yummy. Glad you had a nice time with Cadona and yor daughter. Re: the gluten-free thing, my second daughter has gone off gluten and lactose and her health has improved out of sight. (Used to be a bad asthmatic).

And I'm so happy for you that you have grown internally so much. I used to be angry all the time - removed partner - ended up not angry! Maybe it was the same for you?

Edited at 2012-11-23 11:06 am (UTC)
texasts
Nov. 23rd, 2012 01:45 pm (UTC)
It was a choice this one made. Almost like when she went vegetarian for 5 or 6 years. She still claims to feel much better.

No I was angry before I got that last partner.
kabuldur
Nov. 24th, 2012 11:40 am (UTC)
Oh, okay. I must admit, there is anger still lurking in me, but that partner brought it right out! Maybe I'm not as far advanced as you along the line...*laughs*
phoenixisrisen
Nov. 23rd, 2012 06:44 pm (UTC)
Glad to hear you're doing so well, headspace-wise. And a huge CONGRATS!!!! on the no smoking thing. That is *very* big!!

And glad it was a good day, too. I had cheesecake instead of ice cream, but that sounded yummy. :-)
texasts
Nov. 23rd, 2012 07:09 pm (UTC)
You know how crazy I was when I was still trapped in that damned house, with those hateful nut cases I was living with.

I don't really think it's any kind of miracle though. Took me 2-1/2 years to get over most of that shit. But I think I've finally got my head screwed on mostly straight. As straight as I'll ever get it any way.

That smoking thing. Glad I gave it up. It is kind of a big deal, innit? I've slipped once or twice when under the influence of something else. *laughs* And I still have a full unopened pack I bought quite some time ago, in a moment of weakness and never opened. I'm thinking of having it BRONZED like a pair of baby shoes...
anita_margarita
Nov. 23rd, 2012 08:14 pm (UTC)
Between The Big Clam and messy relationships, that is enough to make anyone angry without knowing why. You're free!
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )

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